Friday, February 29, 2008

My Love/Hate Relationship with Writing

Hello,

As you may assume I kind of like writing. I feel it is an excellent way to organize thoughts, communicate, and tell stories. The fact is that while I like writing it doesn't always like me, and my main problem is always getting started. That is why I write this in letter for because all you need to start is to say hello and then introduce the topic.

Seeing as I am in college it is easy to assume that I do a lot of writing. I would have to say that because of my major and thus the classes I take I actually do very little writing. The only classes that I have to write for are Women's Studies and Intro to Theatre. There is also one major flaw with my style/voice of writing, some people love it and some people hate it. My English teacher in high school hated it, my friends loved it, my history teachers loved it, my french teacher hated me.



Here is a classic example.



My two most recent writings were for the above mentioned classes. I had to write a review of a play and some in class essays on how media can induce more violence against women. I really tried on my in class essays. I put my thoughts supported by some reasonable facts. I had at least okay intros and very strong closing statements. I chose the questions that I would be able to write the most about and I didn't hesitate to say what I thought. They were well organized thought out essays. I haven't gotten them back but I doubt if I get higher than a B-. The teacher for that class hates my style of writing. She hates how I construct sentences and paragraphs. I think in general she hates the voice that comes across in my papers. I will keep doing my best and hope that I get the grade I want.



On the other hand my Intro to Theatre teacher asked us to see a play and then write a review. Well I love plays so I went. I hate starting to write so I put off writing the review until the night before it was due. This happened to be a week later. I sat down and typed up the two pages in less than half an hour. I was tired so I didn't spell or grammar check it. I just printed it out and handed it in. When I got it back I got a 29/30 because of two spelling mistakes. The teacher wrote that my writing was superb and that she looked forward to reading more of my reviews.

So I have no idea what to think about my writing. I suck at spelling and hate starting to write but once I start writing I hate to stop. None of this goes along with my major, seeing as I want to be a doctor. So far in the Pre-med field there is very little writing. So what is a girl to do?

On an unrelated note I just got 5 tee shirts for $8. I love being me, at least sometimes.

Here is the "superb" paper:

If the actors of UMD’s “A Flea in Her Ear” were looking to make the audience laugh, then they have surely succeeded. This French bedroom farce of Georges Feydeaus was brought to life on the UMD thrust stage these past weeks, but this time with a twist. The director decided, and aptly so, that instead of setting the play in its original 1700’s this play would be set in the mid 1920’s.

The actors’ body language and movement, while in high speed, where in perfect harmony with the setting and the play. The speech was supposed to be in stage standard, and most actors executed this with little difficulty. The fast past speech and movement combined with the volume at certain parts of the play sometimes led to all words being lost, and no coherent sentences being formed. This was one of the few things that could jolt one from being enraptured in this enchanting play and pulled back to reality. The characterization was for the most part spot on. The speech and body language all compiled together to make you believe that the actors were in fact the character. The main characters did a wonderful job, but it was the supporting cast that made the show truly complete. The added touch of having the stage crew dressed as servants may have been the added touch that keep the whole show flowing even through scene changes.

The scenery was excellent. From the main house to the Pretty Pussy Inn they were nearly flawless down to the last detail. The simplicity of the house with the opening top window for the maid added just another opportunity to laugh. This simple format with only a few chairs, a desk and a bar, made the entire focus of the audience stay on the words and the movements, as it should be for such a fast paced and linguistically hysterical play. The Pretty Pussy Inn was far more complex, as it should be because this is where the plot really thickens and all characters get themselves tangled up in one monster of a mess that lends only to laughter at the situational and dramatic irony. The lighting only lended to the richness of the sets and the music matched seamlessly to each scene or situation. All in all if the actors weren’t there the stages themselves and the music accompanying them were masterful enough to still attend.

The costumes on the other had done little to impress me. The men were dressed well enough to not lend to too much criticism. In the end how wrong can you go putting the men in suits and ties? The women, however, had vastly unflattering dresses that did nothing to enhance the scenes or even the overall theme. While the actor’s hair and makeup were in order, it was really the costumes that at times seemed rather cartoonish, or even childish. I fear that except for the men in suits the rest simply looked as if they were children playing dress up. This isn’t to say that the costumes didn’t fit, because each one seemed to have been tailor made to the character. It is just that the costumes were at times too comical or disjointed with the setting to allow the suspension of disbelief to continue.

In the end it is a play worth seeing for anyone who desires a good belly laugh. Not a soul in the performance I attended didn’t laugh at least once. I can never walk away from a play that made me laugh with any large amount of malice towards it. The actors did a great job, except for the occasional yelled line that lost all comprehensive value. The scenes were worth the price of admission alone. The attention to detail, with the exception of the costumes, is in the spectrum of great to grand. When the play ended the only flea left in my ear was whispering about the costumes.

Ta Ta!

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

kosovo and castro

Hello,

I am deeply interested these days in the whole Kosovo thing. Can't really explain why. For those of you who don't know this is what it is as explained to a friend of mine (sorry Cari): in Serbia (which used to be part of Russia but broke away and is still allied with Russia) there is a little providence called Kosovo. This has its own government since it was attacked when we were just wee things. Anyway it has been kind of part of Serbia but not really ever since. It also has been under the watch of the UN so that Serbia ( by the way the people there are called serbs) doesn't pick on Kosovo. Well Kosovo has a large Albainian population. 90% of kosovo which is 2 million people are catholic or muslim. Anyway Kosovo was like fuck this shit not really being our own country and the US helped stop the fighting in the past so we are kind of like their friend so we are going to declare our independance and break away from Serbia. Well as all of our history classes have taught us declaring independance isn't really a well excepted thing by the mother country. Serbia wanted to do something about it but they have like no say in the UN and they don't want to provoke the UN so they ran to their allie Russia who is part of the UN. Russia was like (in russian accecnt) fuk das hoes! and called an emergancy meeting ot the UN security councill and said the way they broke away was illegal. But nothing really came from this meeting. America being a simpathetic nation wants to support Kosovo but also doesn't really want to fuck with Russia because well we have a history. Well as you may or maynot know to actually be considered a country after declaring independance a few other countries have to say that you are indepandant (which I mean come on what the fuck is that law? it seems very wishy washy). Well the european union got together and most of them (well our allies at least) said kosovo is its own country and then the US said it was too because hey our allies did it so if Russia starts fucking with them we are in this anyways. Russia and Serbia haven't responded yet but I think it will be a big UN issue/debate, but might get underscored in the US by Castro stepping down. It won't turn out to be too big of a thing because Kosovo is a third the size of belgium. But when the ethnic Albainians were celebrating the independance they not only were waving albainian flags but also US flags (though this might have been to get us on their side in this whole thing because who the fuck doesn't want America looking out for them when they declare independance). As it stands UN troops and international police are still their but working over time because the serbs are a little ticked and ended up bombing the US embassy but they really didn't get that close to it so the builing is pretty much ok and no one was hurt. Thats pretty much it in a nut shell.

Let me know what you all think of this by leaving a comment. Feel free to do your own research this is just my very biased opinion.



Castro, Castro, Castro. What are we to do. We spend years trying to take him out, we even try killing him but aparently he is a little more crafty than Saddam because it never worked. Well very early today Castro suposidly sent out a letter saying that because of his old age and poor health he will step down. The US was like hell yeah, since we couldn't take him out we just waited until he was too old and he took himself out. The only catch here is that he is handing his title down to his brother, who lets face it may be more of a wack job than Castro. His brother is 76 however so if we don't like him we can just wait a few years, because apparently the Castro family can't leave politics of a barely surviving socalist country alone even if they have to control the country from hospital beds with tri-focals and hearing aids and dialasis.



Well all of this is if you believe that Castro is even alive, which most conservatives these days are doubting. They think he is dead because well, we haven't seen him in person in half a year. All of the evidence that he is still alive is in the form of letters and photographs. Conservatives say that these can be doctored up, which they can, and that Castro's younger brother is making them so that Castro seems alive so his accent to power is easier. My opinion is that at this point Castro being alive or dead is a moot point. Really he has stepped down so let him retire or rest in peace. We need to start worrying about his brother and also making a campaign to over throw the Castro family dictatorship. No don't get me wrong, this doesn't nessecarily mean implimenting democracy, it just means getting someone reasonable in the possision of power. Again please I love disscussing this stuff so let me know what you think.



I think Kosovo and Castro might be too simular of words for Bush and this could really get him fucked up. This could be fun. He should be making a speech soon in the next few days seeing as he has actually left the country and will be back and feel over shadowed by the primaries and the corresponding canidates. I really would like to hear Bush say that he supports McCain because then no one will vote for him.



I also would like to hear the canidates views on Castro and Kosovo. They will, however, ignore these issues along with the US debt to mainly China and how they sujest minimizing if not eliminating that debt so that one day China doesn't just call in our debt and we are left fucked over and completely broke, if even that would pay for it, making China more of a super power. Or how about the recession that many economists think we are in and the downward spiral that may soon follow. Are we really, even under the Bush administration, just going to ignore it and hope it goes away? This is not ok. Give me government works, give me anything but war. War is supposed to spark the economy but lets face it every one we are in a war and a ressecion and just going down. We need action and fast. This could mean ending the war. We have heard all of the canidates views on the war, and many want to bring the troops home soon. I, while against the war, am not sure this will help. If we leave before Iraq has legs to stand on it will fall into some other dictators hands and we will be back where we started. The problem is that we have given Iraq plenty of time to set up their own government and find their own diplomatic legs to stand on. We have been training their army, but few want to join the army. They want to lean on the US for as long as they can. We need to start showing them they need to learn how be their own independant country again. This is done by the slow but steady withdrawl of troops. Just because we pull some troops and some violence breaks out, doesn't mean we have to send those troops back. We need to tell the Iraq army to start taking care of it. We need to put out those add campains inspiring the Iraq people to fight for their country. We continue to withdraw until we have only a few hundred troops and army trainers there. Then we leave and let them know we are watching and will help when absolutly neccesary. Just like parents have to do with their children. We then have an allie that won't drain our economy and spirits. This plan is in the best of hopes, and thus is flawed but I think the idea is sound.



Sorry for those who thought this was too political and boring. I get like this sometimes.



Ta Ta.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Memory

Hello,

It is strange how memory works. It calls itself up at the strangest times. There are many theroies on memory and there are many studies being done. I am going to lend my amature thoughts.

They say that sent is the strongest sense tied to memory. If you smell something that you smelled at an event three years ago, you tend to think about that event. But what about something you grew up smelling? What does that remind you of? My answer emotion.

Here are my examples:

The last time I went home I did my laundry at home. This isn't really a big deal because it is free at college too, but I like doing it at home. The one thing home has that I don't at school is real fabric softener, the kind you pour in. This stuff works much better than the dryer sheets. Anyways, as I was getting ready for bed I happened to smell my pajamas. They smelled like my house and the fabric softener my family uses. We have used it my entire life. When my mom did laundry it filled the house. When she tucked me into bed as a little kid her clothes smelled of it. Eachday for 18 years when I put on my clothes I smelled it, and when my clothes didn't smell of it I would through them into my hamper to be washed. But when I smelled this I didn't think really of all those times. I didn't remember spacific events. I felt. When I smelled the fabric softener I instantaneously felt. I felt comfortable. I felt love. I felt the way I do when I first get home, or the way I felt when I would sit on the sofa doing homework, or even my moms hug. It makes me miss home a little, but really the smell just makes me want to smile.

My aunt on my dad's side also has a particular smell. I love it. Some times I smell other women wearing that same sent and it makes me think of her and her kind smile and big hugs. I hope one day when I am an aunt my neices and nephews think the same of my perfume.

Sights are a great reminder also.

Last night my roommate was sick and we had to take her to the E.R. She is ok, but if you were at all concerend that means you are a good person. As I sat in the waiting room I watched a mother stroking her daughters hair. The mom had genuine concern on her face but she wasn't showing that to her teenage daughter. The daughter leaned her head on her mom's shoulder and they sat that way until the daughter put her head in her moms lap. The whole time her mom was very caring but calm. She let her teenaged daughter be in pain and act like she was young. This reminded me of when my mom would take me into the hospital and wait with me. She would comfort me and talk to me. She would stroke my hair or hold my hand. She didn't care that it was 11 at night or that she had to sit in an uncomfortable waiting room. She didn't care that I was complaining or even sometimes too old to act like I needed to be taken care of. I was her daughter and I was sick or hurt and that all she cared about. All she cared about was me. How do you thank someone for that? Grateful isn't the word. That word fails in comparison to what I feel. She was there through everything holding my hand and letting me act like I felt was nessicary. She loved intensely and unconditionally. How do you thank some one for that?

That is all for now.

Ta ta

Monday, February 4, 2008

School and such

Hello,

So if you haven't figured it out yet, I am back at school. It isn't too different, really just new classes. Though I had an interesting experience with my dad's car. So I am just going to rant for a bit. Read if you want to, if not then...why did you come here?

So my classes are Intro to Theatre Arts, Calc for the Natural Sciences, Biology 2, and Women's Studies. Each has something to talk about. It is a 16 credit course load (for those of you who don't know an average course load, or at least I am told, is 15). So far it is not too bad, just a lot of reading.

Intro to Theatre has anywhere form 40-100 pages a week of reading. The teacher is ok, very perky and always has the sunny disposition. That is ok, just not for 9 am. She is pregnant so I think I am more intrested to see how big this very skinny lady will get. She has been on broadway a few times and loves all aspects of theatre which is good, but I am sorry for most of it I just don't care. I don't care how they make sets or where they make them. I just don't. I enjoy a good play, I really do, but this is for credit so I just want it over with. I did D.I. for 9 years so I guess that counts as acting but most of it was improv.

Calc for the Natural Sciences is ok. It is just what I thought it would be. I mainly get what has been taughts so far, though I struggled with discrete time dynamical systems. All is well now. The teacher has too many audible pauses for my taste however. It seems like every other word is um or ah. I can't stand it. I sit in the back so when I get something that she is teaching I just talk to John (the guy who I always sit by). He makes it easier to go to class.

Bio 2 is ok. I find the teacher a little annoying just in her voice and laugh and mannorisms. Othere than that its ok, except for I dislike my TA for lab and discussion. So really I just like the suject matter. While not really, we are studying plants. Those aren't my area bio. I just pretend that I am Cari and then I really enjoy it. Soon when we swithch teachers half way though and switch to animals I will enjoy it. I hear we get to disect a fetal pig. I have already done that so it will be smooth sailing.

Women's Studies is going to kill me. We have 70 to 150 pages a week. It is a three hour class once a week at night. The subject matter so far doesn't intrest me and it upsets me that just because I am a female I am supposed to agree with everything the teacher is saying. Here is my real hang up. I am not a feminist. I like men and the advances that they have given to human kind. I like that women have/are working for equality, but seeing as I am a middle class white woman in a mainly democratic state living in a college community, I don't really see much inequality. Sometimes I think that creates reverse discrimination. Here is what I think. To be completely fair and to give the best qualified individual the job/ entrance to college there should be no place to mark down your race or sex. This would mean that everyone has to work and compete with everyone to get what they want. That is the capitalist system, which from what I have taken in the feminists hate. I know it sucks for some but I do believe that those willing to work hard can get ahead.

Other than that life is ok. So here is the tire story. I was picked up by my father and we drove to the Twin Cities together. I dropped him off at the airport and took the car back. I got a flat tire. I heard the flat, it just came out of no where, so I pulled way over on the side of I-35 N. I could see the exit for the other side so I knew what mile marker I was at. Then I did what any rational person would do I called my mommy. She told me to call someone to get help, though I felt perfectly capable of changing the tire myself. I think she was leary of me doing that on the side of I-35, so she had me call the police who put me in touch with the state patrol who patched me over to a wreaker service. When the wreaker service came a man with one arm climbed out of the truck and changed my tire. The flat tire was on the passenger side in the back. He changed the tire, though I helped some and felt like a complete fool because I could have done it myself. So I then asked the guy where at 5:45 at night I could get a new tire, seeing as I didn't want to drive the 45 min back on the doughnut if I didn't have to. He directed me to a place 20 min away, if you drive the speed limit, but the guy told me not to do over 45 mph on the doughnut so it took me a bit longer and a muiltitude of cars honking or fliping me off. When I got to the tire place I met, to put it nicely, some interesting people. The guy behind the counter who apparently was running the place had all of three teeth. He came out and looked at the tire and told me they couldn't patch it and then he went to see if he had that tire in stock. He came back told me they didn't but could have it there in two days. I asked him if I could make it back on the doughnut and he said yes. So I went back driving between 40 and 50 mph. I made it back just fine except very slowly. The next day I called the honda dealership, and they told me to bring the car in. So I did and they told me that they would have to order a new tire, and that if I wanted to go some place else to get the tire that was fine but to make sure they were trained to deal with the computer inside the tire because its a new system and if they screw it up it will cost us a lot more. The honda place qouted me at 200 dollars. So I called around and found that the honda dealership had the best price and are the only ones that can deal with the computer thingy. So the tire will be here soon and they will call me as soon as it comes in. The whole thing was an experience. I was really pissed off that night but now find it all a little funny. Though I find it dishearting that only one person stopped when I was on the side of the road and he only offered to call someone for me, this is after I had called the wreaker.

That is all for now,
Ta Ta